How to Survive A Relationship Breakup and Make It Through the Change…


When a woman breaks up with a man, or vice versa, a rebirth takes place within her.  She is never the same after that moment, and she is changed forever.

She learns through the change.  She grows and learns life lessons that change her forever.  And in most cases, she comes out wiser, smarter, and stronger than ever before.

But before she is born again, into this new woman and into the new life that is waiting for her, she first dies.

First, before she is reborn, she experiences all of the pain and the hurt that the breakup has caused her, and she mourns over everything she has lost.

It then occurs to her, that she is not only grieving over one man and one relationship.  It occurs to her, that she is grieving over the many different companions that she had in that one partner.

Like the friend that she had in that man, and the lover that leaves her.

And most times, the hardest thing for her to mourn over is the ‘happily ever after’ that she thought she was this close to having, but is once again swept up from under her patent leather high heels.

That perhaps, is the hardest thing for her to bounce back from – the fact that she must once again, dust herself off, and start over.

And though that brokenhearted woman may get a chance to experience a love greater than the one she lost in the future, to her it seems like love will never return.

If you are that woman, that has had her heart broken to the point of semmingly no return, I am here to tell you that you will make it through this.

Life will return to normalcy again – even if it doesn’t seem like it now.

The key, however, is to be grateful for the experience of that person and that relationship.  The key is to learn from all of the life lessons that that person and that relationship has came to teach you.

Sometimes, we women try to control the relationships that we have with people.  We tend to get disappointed when a certain relationship does not lead to the particular result that we wanted – like a marriage.

But the truth of the matter is that, not all relationships were meant to last a lifetime.  Some were meant to teach us life lessons that we need in order to learn, develop, and mature into great wives for the man that is meant to be our husband.

I, as a woman, can honestly say that I am so thankful for my previous relationships before I got married.  Because even though I failed, I really won –  because I learned from my past.

From those relationships, I learned how to love, I grew, I matured into the woman and the wife that I am now, and I learned how to forgive.

When you leave a relationship in your life, be thankful for all that it has taught you.  Learn from the lessons that that person has taught you.  Take all of those moments of joy that you had with that person, and seal them in a time capsule where you can always remember that even though the two of you didn’t make it, it was still love.

Remember that even though the two of you are no longer together, that it was still significant, and it will always be a part of your journey.

Just because your relationship with a certain person dies and runs its course, does not mean that it was pointless or a complete waste of your time.  It just means that it wasn’t meant to last a lifetime.  That relationship taught you lessons about how to give love, how to receive it, and how to sustain it.

You always learn twice as more through failure, than you ever do with winning.

Be thankful for the time you shared with that person.  Be thankful that you even had the opportunity to meet someone and experience that kind of love with them – even if it didn’t last.

There are people that pray for the love you experienced – even if it was only for a couple of weeks, or months, or even days.  Be thankful for that love, and always take the lessons that relationship taught you with you every day of your life.

It may seem like to you, that you will never be happy again.  Or like you will never smile at the things that once made you happy.  Or like you will never laugh at the jokes that used be so funny – but trust me, you will.  It may be hard to imagine a future for yourself without that person, but it’s there.

You can move on.

You have the strength inside of you.

You will make it through.

And once you make it through, you will be stronger, wiser, smarter, more equipped and better prepared for the next relationship in the next chapter of your life.

In order to survive the change.. learn, grow, forgive, and give thanks.

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